Getting Pulled Over Doesn't Have to Mean You Get a Ticket...

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I wouldn't say that I'm a bad driver, but I wouldn't necessarily say that I'm a cautious, slow driver either. I generally try to go a maximum of seven or eight mph over the speed limit, but occasionally, I get a little carried away. (Especially when I'm running behind, which is...always.)

Lately, I've had a bad string of luck when it comes to getting pulled over. Most people might groan and say that they "feel my pain" right about now, but let me tell you, getting pulled over by St. Louis' finest has actually been pretty painless. Let me put it this way - I've been stopped for speeding three times in the past few weeks, but that doesn't necessarily mean that I ended up with any speeding tickets. Maybe I'm just lucky, or maybe I'm a smooth talker, but I always seem to escape this costly punishment for my lead foot.

Here are a few tricks that I've picked up on when it comes to escaping a speeding ticket:

• I'm not exactly sure how gentlemen would fare with this tactic, but ladies, turn on the waterworks. I know it seems cliche, but it's worked pretty well for me on numerous occasions. Sorry guys, but most of you have absolutely no idea what to do with a sobbing woman, and male cops usually tell me to take a few deep breaths, calm down and please drive slower.
• Just play stupid. If you seem really earnest about never driving on that particular road and not knowing anything about what the speed limit is, cops will often let you off the hook. Keep in mind, you have to be nowhere near a speed limit sign for this method to actually work.
• As far as what you say to the cop, a couple different methods always work for me.One is to launch into such an elaborate, lengthy explanation for how late you are, then follow that up with an apology for that not being an excuse to break the law. Usually, they're so worn out and annoyed that they just wave me on. The other method I use it to make myself sound like Mother Teresa's niece. Basically, I say that I was giving a friend in need a lift, which made me late to my charity work since I was coming from church, etc., etc. They're usually a bit more likely to put their clipboard away after that.
• And if you want to avoid getting pulled over for speeding in the first place, keep it at a maximum of nine mph over the speed limit. A policeman once told me that if you're not going at least 10 mph over the speed limit on a highway, it's not even worth their time to pull you over, and I believe him.

And yes, I've been knocking on wood the entire time I've been writing this post. How do you get out of your run-ins with the law?